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05-Jan-2020 18:40

My teen years were a bit different than my classmates’ because, on top of my studies, they also included travelling to England to bury my father and caring for my mom, who was in and out of the hospital and passed away in 2012 from cancer.

Between dealing with all these “adult things,” dating was far from my mind.

That it really is a conversation better to have in-person. However, sometimes I just hope that they’ve already read about it somehow.

A few months ago, I went on a date with someone I met through a colleague. When we eventually broke up, and it had nothing to do with my HIV, but rather that he was older (duh) and ready to settle down and I wasn’t in the same headspace.

On some LGBTQ dating sites, there is an option to check a box if you’re HIV-positive.

After talking to a few people who use those sites, I realized a lot of people don’t feel comfortable disclosing that way. Sometimes I want my status to be the first thing I bring up, like I’m wearing it on a shirt.

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I wondered what would happen if the whole city found out.I have a great infectious diseases doctor who is always willing to have conversations with my partners and to make sure we are taking the right precautions. The truth is, I’m basically just like any other 20-something in Toronto. The only difference is that while some people might have an ex that they’re worried to bring up, or some family drama they are afraid to delve into during those first few dates, I have those things HIV.



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